Shit happens - en guide bland
Taoism: Shit happens.
Hare Krishna: Shit happens, rama rama ding ding.
Hinduism: This shit happened before!
Islam: If shit happens, take a hostage.
Zenbuddhism: What is the sound of shit happening?
Atheism: There is no such thing as shit.
Buddhism: When shit happens, is it really shit?
Confucianism: Confucius says: Shit happens.
7th day adventist: Shit happens on saturdays.
Protestantism: Shit won't happen if I work harder.
Catholicism: If shit happens, I deserve it.
Jehova's witness: Knock, knock; "Shit happens!"
Mormon: Shit happens again and again and again....
Unitarian: What is this shit?
Fundamentalism: If shit happens, read your bible.
Marxism: Workers! Let's stand united and fight against all this shit!
Deism: God created this shit, but where is he now?
Judaism: Why does this shit always happen to me...?
Sekularism: Religious shit and social shit mustn't be mixed together!
Sikhism: No matter how much shit happens, I'll never cut my hair.
Livets ord: Fill our bag with money, or god's son, Ulf Ekman, will shit
Satanism: To hell with all this shit!
Voodoism: Shit will happen to you when we put needles in a fetisch.
Nazism: Our brains are full of shit, that's why we're so stupid.
Vegan: If shit happens to animals, don't eat it.
Anti-vegan: If shit happens to animals, I'll be the first to wear it.
Militant vegan: We will make shit happen to Scan.
Freudianism: If shit happens to you, blame it on your childhood.
CSN: If shit happens, YOU will be the last to know!
Existensialism: What is shit anyway?
Agnosticism: Maybe shit happens, maybe it doesn't.
Realism: Shit happens several times and finally you die.
Murphyism: If shit can happen, it surely will.
Platonism: There is an ideal shit happening somewhere.
Cynicism: Of course shit happens!
Ocultism: Shit materializes from other planes of existence.
Terrorism: Shit will happen to you unless you do as we say!
Puritanism: S*** can happen all the time as long as you don't call it that.
Surrealism: Purple shit happens in front of melting clocks.
Optimism: If shit happens, we'll find a way to use it!
Pessimism: If shit happens, I bet there won't be enough for everybody.
Tabloid sensationalism: Green
shit from mars happens to Elvis clone.
Bureaucracy: I don't care if shit happens or not, just fill out the form!
Socialism: If shit happens, let's distribute it equally.
Conservatism: Shit nowadays doesn't happen like it used to do!
Microcomputing: If shit happens, we'll fix it in the next version.
Anti-microsoft: If shit happens, blame it on Bill Gates.
Teenager: Asså, ja ba' shit happens, typ.
Rastafarianism: Aw, let's just smoke this shit!!!